I’m glad I found this site. I feel more in control knowing there are actions I can take instead of feeling angry and helpless.
A few days prior, this was my story.
When stepping off the trolley, before my foot even hit the pavement, “Bitch nice glasses” was hollered at me. I was caught off guard and didn’t say anything, but am sure I made an angry, uncomfortable face.
When he didn’t get the response he was looking for he attempted to demand my attention by yelling, “Anyone ever do this to you?” and licked in between his fingers, motioning that he was going down on a woman. I hate that gesture, when has that ever been sexy? It’s gross and infuriates me. I flicked him off, told him he was rude and to f* off. Then he calls me a cunt cause I wasn’t excited about it. I apologized to a mother and child for swearing in front of them and the dude started at it again.
I was so angry, I called him an ignorant pig, shook my textbook at him and said I should beat him with it. He then dropped his pants and smacked his bare ass as he walked away. It made me so mad I cried in the bus stop. It happens so fast. I’m glad he left when he did.
His intention was to get a rise out of me and he was successful. The only thing worse than that feeling, is knowing the other person is getting away with it and will do it again. I’m glad to now know strategies to detour that behavior.
This isn’t the first time. I’ve been followed for blocks, crossed the street only for them to cross with me. I’ve been told my tattoo on my chest is “begging for his head to be shoved between my tits.”
“Does the carpet match the drapes?” & “Can I get your number?” are common introduction sentences.
I’ve been told all the dirty things someone would want to do to me while in a gas station. Some guy said he would let me fart in his mouth and hold it in until I told him to let it out. I didn’t even know people did that. Another guy asked me, “What I could do with 9 inches.”
Seriously? That is not something you ask/tell a stranger. It is disrespectful, disgusting and made me feel 100% uncomfortable.
I don’t dress provocatively, I rarely wear makeup. I am a 5’9″ nerd. Not someone “begging for it” (sarcasm, an outfit does not justify harassment). People would say I am nice. I’m not one to yell fuck you at a bus stop, but there I was doing it.
For someone to make another human being feel this uncomfortable and unsafe, only because they are different, is immoral.
– Anonymous
Location: Cleveland, OH
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Holy shit, you run into some particularly vulgar harassers. Unbelievable–what neanderthals. I am so, so sorry you have to deal with this garbage…that we all have to deal with this garbage on some level or another.
I’m so sorry. Assholes. There doesn’t seem to be a right way to react does it.
You’ve done everything right, I am so sorry you’ve had to experience these things. I also had to apologize to a woman and her children for screaming at a man who had just walked by and started to whisper what he’d like to do to me…how horrible the bystanders don’t always see what is happening and just see your reaction. Fortunately in my case though the woman gave me a look like SHE UNDERSTOOD EVERYTHING.
You’re not getting harassed because you are different, you’re getting harassed because there are some sick fucks out there and unfortunately you met them.
KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK at standing up for yourself and sharing your stories with us! Thank you.
Reading what you’ve been through made me sick to my stomach. I don’t know how any of these bottom-feeders can go home feeling good about themselves after what they did to you.
Though standing up to them didn’t make them stop, I commend you for holding your ground regardless. That takes guts.
That is disgusting. Reading the stories on this site makes me so angry. Your assholes sound like they are especially vulgar and I am sorry you had to put up with that.
It’s sickening just how common and not only that but accepted this behavior is in our society. It’s symptomatic of male (I refuse to call them men, and I won’t call them animals as that would be insulting to animals) entitlement, how they feel they have a right to us, to our sexuality, to our bodies, and have the right to say whatever they want to us.
I’ve been accused of being a racist bitch because I ignored black men who holla’d at me, I have had harassers not even swayed by the sight of my wedding ring asking me if I felt like having an affair, and I’ve been followed for blocks. It’s terrifying and sickening, and it’s all the more telling of their entitlement for assuming that the women they proposition in these ways are straight, single, or at all interested in being picked up. And as I have illustrated, many of them don’t even care if you’re single! I actually did tell one ass that even if I were single I prefer men, not little boys who reek of desperation with their actions because this catcalling and such is exactly that…it’s desperation for a woman’s attention, because they feel entitled to it.
Ugh.
Shame you didn’t hit him with that textbook. What a pig, but then calling him a pig is insulting our wonderful living creatures. No he’s a disgusting pervert who has no respect for women OR any respect for himself. I pity him. Meanwhile im sorry you’ve had to put up with these scumbags filthy words and actions. Just comes to show that they must have been rejected so many times because they are so ugly and repulsing! 😉
This is grouse. Never fart close to someone else.
hho, you do know that the woman who submitted the story was harassed, right? This isn’t about someone standing close to someone and farting. A guy said something strange, bizarre, and vulgar to her about some sick fetish he has. I don’t think you get it.