What a creeper

I am not exactly happy to hear that others experience harassment as well, but it makes me feel a little better. So, I have this creepy guy at work. I am usually a very approachable, pleasant person, and even if someone totally creeps me out I don’t shoot them a dirty look. Perhaps I am too polite.

Ever get that feeling that you’re being whatched? Well, I had that feeling in the cafeteria, and I look over, and there is creepy dude, standing stock still, just STARING. I try to ignore it and finish my food, and look up like 45 seconds later, and he is STILL staring, unmoving. What a creeper.

When I see him in the hallway he stares. Only when I am in the faculty lounge by myself, does he seem to show up. But the last straw was him going past my classroom 4 times, eyeball fu****g me each time. Here I am trying to learn law, and he is like a shark, circling my class. His stares are predatory. I am moving forward with a sexual harassment grievance, but it is strange…I feel guilty, and confused.

– anonymous

Location: Auburn Hills, MI

Share your street harassment story today and help raise awareness about the problem. Include your location and it will be added to the Street Harassment Map.

Story shared with me by Holla Back DC! since it happened outside the DC region

7 Responses to What a creeper

  1. Golden Silence says:

    I am moving forward with a sexual harassment grievance…

    Yes!

    …but it is strange…I feel guilty, and confused.

    Don’t. Your stalker needs to feel guilty, not you.

  2. BearBear Avenger says:

    Don’t feel guilty!
    ANY kinda harassment is still harassment. I know that feeling too. I worked at a homeless shelter where at LEAST 50% of the “Guests” had committed crimes of a sexual nature. We had them ALL. Child rapists, Level 3 sex offenders, you name it, we had it. And every time I looked up someone was either leering or persistently asking me out. Really annoying and sometimes really scary.

  3. Jeff says:

    Don’t feel guilty! It’s his fault, not yours. That’s what they *want* you to feel- guilt, shame, fear, confusion, etc. This is how the system perpetuates itself!

  4. AJL says:

    His actions are the cause here, definitely not yours! It seems like there is one in every department in academia –

    I have a guy doing stuff like that to me (unfortunately, I know him, and he waited about 10 months before becoming a total creeper rather than the somewhat creepy person he had been). He also makes inappropriate comments and grabs/pokes/”playfully” punches me and, when I react with anything but approval and happiness, he hounds me about what was “wrong” (or whips me in the rear with his scarf thing *sigh*). He even repeatedly interrupts me while I was trying to work. I’m keeping a journal of every incident (date/time/incident) if it gets to the point that avoiding him doesn’t even help. It might help you to do that, too. I feel at least a bit empowered just having the thing, even if I don’t end up doing anything with it.

  5. Jeff says:

    AJL, it’s good that you feel better keeping that journal, but what are you waiting for? From your description, that guy is acting completely inappropriately, and should be dealt with immediately. How many other women is he doing this sort of crap to?

  6. AJL says:

    I don’t know how many other women he targets, but I do know I will not be believed (it is one thing to write things down in a journal, and another thing entirely to have proof that will stand up to scrutiny). I have to wait until he does something that a third party notices, unfortunately. So far, that has not happened, even when he does inappropriate things when others are around, as I found out the hard way when I complained to someone about something he had just done to me right in front of her, and she hadn’t seen it.

    I was in a similar situation over the summer (different job, different people), and the guy did finally make a mistake. Once he made one, he just kept making them, so I ended up on much better footing! I had multiple witnesses and at least one other person who came forward with complaints. It was actually that incident that inspired me to keep a journal this time around because when I got interviewed, I really wished I had kept one so I could remember everything.

  7. Melle says:

    I hope he stops that behavior. How does staring at someone in such a creepy way make sense?! I think some people do not realize they are doing it but in his case it seems deliberate!

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